Not sure about this...
Riddle me this... do you think it's a bad thing that I've started talking to my students about how I don't think I'm a very good teacher? I've discussed this with at least three of my students in as many days.
And riddle me this... why won't they stop talking in class? Do I have so little authority that they don't care at all what I say?
Also a riddle... I don't mind vamping for time at the beginning of class. Sure, go get your book from your locker. We can't start without you and you won't be back for three minutes. That's three minutes I don't have to fill. Why can't I be a teacher that has so many important things to say that I need the whole class period to fill them? Who am I kidding? That will never be me.
Some of my students tell me I'm a good teacher. I assume they're kissing up. Or just trying not to hurt my feelings. Then they tell me about other teachers they've had and I think, okay, maybe I'm not that bad.
In other news: I haven't been dizzy today. First day in more than a week. Do I still need to get the expensive bloodwork done? Probably. Dang it.
Also in other news: I was playing volleyball last night at Rec and jammed my left ring finger pretty bad. I can't wear my wedding ring. And it hurts like the dickens. I think maybe my body has prioritized this pain over the dizziness. So when the pain goes, the dizziness comes back. We'll wait and see.
Also: Thanksgiving break starts on Sunday at 12:30. Sunday mornings I have parent/teacher conferences. How do I have a parent/teacher conference? I don't know what to say. What do these people want to hear? I've never been to one of these. Do they teach you how to do this in the education program? Also, I think all the parents will see that it's all just a facade. This me as a teacher thing. So that's my self doubts for today.
I'm glad we have a break very soon. I want to cry. It's a mixture of the pain and frustration. I'll be okay.
5 comments:
so here's my thoughts on parent teacher conferences. You could use really big words that normal people would never know the meaning of to describe their kids and, you know, just in general conversation. Or you could try using an English accent, I don't know one american who would challenge an English person on their usage, and therefore teachage, of the English language. Or you could fill the room and your desk with all the books you've read. That would be impressive - though they may think you're trying to compensate for something. so yeah...feel free to use any or all of my ideas.
And seriously....seriously...don't worry about the whole am i a good teacher. you're to stubborn and "neurotic" not to be good at something you do for a living. plus you've read way to many books and know way to many big words...plus your funny and that makes for a good, well, anything. seriously.
I'm going to see you on December 19.
Let the gladness abound.
(From me, and you, and all the world.)
Ben, I am way excited to see you in about a month. That will be good in many ways.
Leslie, thanks for making me laugh. Today has not been great and I needed that. I don't know if I can pull off an English accent for that long. And yeah, having all the books I've ever read there with me would probably be funny, but difficult to haul.
Thanks for the encouragement.
I can absolutely relate to the problem of filling class time. I think only people who have been teaching a long time can fill the time up with with all their talking. Or people who have way too much to say.
Last year I taught M,W,F for 50 minutes class periods and I had trouble filling the time. This year I'm teaching T,Th for 1 hr and 15 minutes. Holy cow, that's a long time. I almost always let them go 15-20 minutes early. That's probably where I have an advantage, though. I'm not supposed to let them go early, but nobody knows if I do. People would probably know if you end class early, huh? And not be happy? My sympathies. For real.
When we have 50 minute classes on Fridays I can fill the time up no problem, it's the other day, 75 minute classes that make me want to curl up into the fetal position and just rock myself to sleep. But since I only teach other day, I still think it's worth it. Yeah. 75 minutes. It's a lot of time.
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